It should be obvious to anyone who visits my social media that my raison d’etre is supporting survivors of domestic abuse, and raising awareness that abuse happens in the church, just as much outside of it, so that we can make the church a safer place.
It often astounds me then the amount of people who pop onto my Facebook page to chastise me for being sweary. Before we even get into thinking about what the bible means when it talks about how we should use our words in wholesome ways, where are your priorities if you are commenting on a page about domestic abuse, not to support the much needed fight against abuse, but to complain about naughty words?
In Judges 19 you can read about the horrific rape, murder and dismemberment of a woman. The chapter ends with God’s people collectively gasping in horror at this act of gender based violence, they say “We must do something! So speak up!”
Just imagine, finding a page that similarly speaks about violence against women and being similarly outraged to the point you feel you MUST do something, you must speak up! Only for that speaking up not to be about violence against women, but about a woman swearing.
I guess chastising violent men is a bit scarier than telling off an angry women eh?
And yes, I’m angry, yes I swear, you know why? Because when it comes to God’s sons choosing to abuse God’s daughters in God’s house, there is no more appropriate language to describe how absolutely fucking outrageous that is. I’m angry about it. God is angry about it, and you should be too. Just imagine. We must do something. So speak up!
When the bible speaks about unwholesome words, it is not referring to those who cry out in anger at injustice, it is referring to those who disguise their hatred of others in softly spoken eloquent words, those who use spiritual language to tear down and destroy. Those men who stand in pulpits and teach that women must be silent and submissive, those men who who draft laws to write transgender people out of history, those men who give eloquent speeches that dehumanise immigrants, those who write articles that spread lies about gay people. Those abusers who calmly and quietly whisper words of death into their wives ears until she is broken and terrified. THAT is unwholesome talk.
So before you start your holier than thou speech about how unladylike I am, know this: I don’t care! And I will continue to be unladylike until the men of God recognise that when it comes to domestic abuse, we must do something, we must speak up
